(note: Nyquil is a dangerous product and one should not use it unless actually necessarily, such as in my toothachey, stomach-virusy case)

HEY! Are you feeling UNCOMFORTABLY PAINED? Like something hit your jaw and it's KICKED YOUR ASS? Like your toothache hurts worse than being kicked by a GORILLA? Then try Nyquil! You'll feel SO GOOD.

You'll drink it and you'll be like "hey this tastes like the color it is. Why didn't they make it a tastier color?" But COLORS DON'T HAVE TASTE YOU CRAZY LIBERAL!

It'll kick in in about 15 minutes: your conscious mind will be like "hey, this pain still hurts." and you'll be like "FUCK YOU ASSHOLE" and kick it in the face with your HAZY HALLUCINATIONS and SUDDEN CESSATION OF FEELING!

You'll be out in like HALF AN HOUR! THATS THIRTY MINUTES.

And then you'll wake up 14 hours later and not KNOW WHAT YOUR NAME IS. But thats OK, because the pain HAS ONLY BARELY RETURNED.

Spend your day feeling woozy and at 10PM the next night REPEAT THE CYCLE ETERNALLY FOREVER. Like  in that song by JIM MORRISON!

NYQUIL IS DOORS ALBUMS IN A BOTTLE! ITS DOORS ALBUMS IN A BOTTLE! NYQUIL IS MADE OF RECORDS!
(Warning: may affect use of the English Language)