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Charlie Fish
Level 7: 1909 points
Alltime Score: 10301 points
Last Logged In: April 11th, 2017
BADGE: INTERREGNUM TEAM: United Kingdom TEAM: Group Creation Public Badge TEAM: Team Shplank TEAM: SFZero Animal Posse TEAM: The Society For Figuring Out How To Get Those Damn Badges TEAM: Whimsy BART Psychogeographical Association Rank 3: Cartographer The University of Aesthematics Rank 1: Expert Biome Rank 1: Hiker Chrononautic Exxon Rank 1: Clockwatcher Society For Nihilistic Intent And Disruptive Efforts Rank 4: The Chaotic

15 + 165 points

Office Arms Race by Charlie Fish

July 22nd, 2007 3:43 AM

INSTRUCTIONS: Create a weapon from office supplies.

OK, this is my debut task completion, so I hope I can work out how to display everything here.

- smaller



Voila, the Office Kill 5000...



So called because it has five ways to kill you, and the word "thousand" makes it sound cool.



Here's a close up of the pincushion mace and the sharp objects.



This is a slightly wrinkly looking apple before encountering the Office Kill 5000.



This is the apple after encountering the Office Kill 5000. Mwahahahaaaaa!



This is the Office Kill 5000 after encountering the apple.


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Here's a video of the apple-Office Kill encounter. I'm a little concerned about the scary side this task has brought out in me. I'll have to do something thoroughly fluffy next.



Perhaps the Office Kill 5000 was too complicated. I tried a simpler solution, involving a juicy cherry tom and a Very Large Stapler.


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My muppet-brained work colleague volunteered to try and get the juicy cherry tom. Brave lad. I didn't even have to tell him that I'd taken the staples out. Office weapons rule!

33 vote(s)

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10 comment(s)

(no subject)
posted by travelbug on July 22nd, 2007 6:19 PM

I had lots of favorite parts in this movie, but the best was when we got to see the the poor beat-up, yet heroic, Office Kill 5000 after meeting "the apple." And wow, those jaws-like teeth on Office Kill were razor sharp, huh?

(no subject)
posted by Ziggy C. on July 22nd, 2007 10:22 PM

Hahah!! So entertaining. I adore the little *pop* sound that is produced when the OK5k stabs the apple the second time before incessantly ramming it onto the desk repeatedly.

Awesome start, if you ask me. Welcome to the game.

(no subject)
posted by Rainbow Bright on July 22nd, 2007 10:41 PM

Welcome to SF0. Glad to see a new player start out with such a strong showing. We have had some weak task completions lately, so I'm overjoyed to see someone new who has gone the extra mile. Congrats.

Thanks guys!
posted by Charlie Fish on July 23rd, 2007 2:12 AM

Thanks to all of you for voting for me! I'm feeling very encouraged. I like this game. Perhaps too much.

Our last best hope?
posted by Jellybean of Thark on July 23rd, 2007 8:35 AM

We may yet be able to defend against the killer robots.

posted by Tøm on August 19th, 2007 2:04 PM

Where can I buy one?

Are they available from all good arms dealers/office supplies stockists?

(no subject)
posted by Adam on September 29th, 2007 4:24 PM

You squashed a Cherry Tomato without wearing goggles?

Those things are vicious. You get them from the salad bar at Pizza Hut and then they squirt when you poke them with your fork.

Might be a British thing

(no subject)
posted by Arden Arnold on November 7th, 2007 10:26 PM

I once made the stationary counterpart to this masterpiece- a sculpture I call "Attack of the office supplies". maybe we should team up.

(no subject)
posted by Caroline The Curly on November 14th, 2007 10:31 PM

ahhhh! I love the sounds the office kill 5000 makes when encountering the apple. though I couldn't quite tell who won, they both seemed rather killed... well, no law says a weapon has to survive its encounter, just destroy the enemy, afterall, bombs don't survive the enemy, but the enemy doesn't survive either. good job!

(no subject)
posted by *la nerdrice* on December 1st, 2007 6:30 PM

i just can't stop replaying.. great!