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Jamila
Level 1: 10 points
Alltime Score: 290 points
Last Logged In: January 31st, 2008


retired
15 + 20 points

Dream Resume by Jamila

January 30th, 2007 4:49 PM

INSTRUCTIONS: Poached from the fantastic surrealists: Create an employment-style resume that chronicles your skills, achievements, "work history", etc. from your dreams. Post to Monster.com or craigslist (or send/email/fax to a potential employer), and post any follow up responses you receive.

Available on Craigslist @ http://sfbay.craigslist.org/sfc/res/270975981.html

D.P. CROSS' Backgroud:

EDUCATION
1971–1975 Evergreen State College Olympia, WA
B.A., History with an emphasis in Nazi Studies.

EXPERIENCE
2004–Present Avama Institute Springfield, IL
Hair Stylist

Providing full-service hair care to blind welfare recipients.
Honored as Employee of the Month two times since 2004.
Suggested styles and services that increased earnings by 23%.

1990–2004 SSRG Security Services Bend, OR
Technical Writer
Wrote manuals for security professionals in Oregon, Idaho, and Vermont on proper uses of racial profiling and paralyzing force.
Drafted warning labels for company’s six types of pepper spray.
Created and maintained newsletter for Bend-office employees and their families. Circulation: 12.

1985–1990 Ferguson Pickles Woodridge, NJ
Labor Management Consultantn
Used skills in social control to improve worker efficiency by seven percent. Created successful plan to prevent unionization in the factories.
Implemented mandatory diet program lowering insurance costs for corporate.

1980–1984 Condon Institute Fargo, ND
Riot Analyst
Traveled the world documenting studies on riot motivation.
Managed four other analysts in central African villages.
Led publishing efforts on How to Riot: The Anarchists Guide to Change.

INTERESTS
Carpentry, Opera, Reality Television, Social Control, Archery, and Recyling.

REFERENCES AVAILABLE UPON REQUEST



it's ok to contact this poster if you are a potential employer or other principal
it's NOT ok to contact this poster with services or other commercial interests

YUP ANOTHER JOB OFFER TO DREAM ME



Jack of All Trades: Riot Expert to Hair Stylist (lower nob hill)
I am a small salon in Oakland in the Rockridge area. I am looking for one more full time stylist to fill up the salon. I am a proffessional, positive, family oriented salon. I have been a salon owner for 2 years now and growing. I will be opening up a spa in the next 3 to 5 years, so I am looking for stylist that want to grow with me and to have the professional attitude to be the best they can possibly be. I also offer in house education, full time receptionist. The postion if for a chair rental. If you are interested in the position, please contact me at:

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posted by Ian Kizu-Blair on February 1st, 2007 4:25 PM

Led publishing efforts on How to Riot: The Anarchists Guide to Change.

Implemented mandatory diet program lowering insurance costs for corporate.

I'd hire dream-you.