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beverly penn
Level 1: 10 points
Alltime Score: 2262 points
Last Logged In: April 30th, 2008

15 + 23 points

Document A Construction by beverly penn

June 8th, 2006 5:58 PM

INSTRUCTIONS: Document A Construction

Well, it's time to reveal a truth. I just can't contain it any longer.

A little while back it was made clear to us SF0 folks by our dear friend Oliver that we had all been duped; that he had created his beloved "Mean Jeannine" and got many of us to not only believe in her, but some of us to attempt to gain her favor as a possible infiltrator. Now, I didn't ask Mean Jeannine for much, but I did befriend her in an exchange of a few innocuous emails. I felt a bit of a fool.

I must say that I thought Oliver's approach to the creation of Miss Jeannine was brilliant. He stuck to the rules and fooled us all. What more could you ask for? But, I didn't think it deserved to go unpunished, so to speak.

So, this was the plan:
To rig up a trap for dear Oliver--prankster adept-- while he was away in London with the billionaire cosmonaut. The trap had to involve glitter (because Oliver LOVES GLITTER!). Glitter and unicorns. Why not throw in some Super Balls and glow-in-the-dark stars? And some more unicorns. And TUMBLING BEARS! Anyhow, the idea was to have all of this fantastic and insidious glittery goodness fall on, or in front of, Oliver as he walked in the porch door.You'll see the plans as they were written up by Fred (my non-SF0 collaborator, and someone who has good cause to play a prank on Oliver, as Oliver played a rather complicated and long-suffered prank on him years ago that was never avenged).

It was also the case that my stranger in the Missive From Strangers from Friends actually wrote a letter to Oliver, not the postcard I had pictured. I simply told her that we were playing a game and that Oliver was winning. I placed the letter in Oliver's mailbox after the trap was set up. This was the text:

Let's be honest...this game is far from over and any success you may have had--key word "had"--will soon be lost!

-Your hot lava mama"

"Hot lava mama"! Perfect!

I'm pretty sure Oliver suspected me, as he hinted as much yesterday. It's possible he still suspected me when I thwarted his cryptic accusations. I am not sure. But as I said, I just couldn't wait any longer. So here it is.

And Oliver, just for the record, it was all done out of love.

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7 vote(s)


(none yet)

10 comment(s)

(no subject)
posted by Ink Tea on June 8th, 2006 9:55 PM

The glitter bomb is fantastic, but probably too complicated. We should talk about technique.


(no subject)
posted by Oliver X on June 8th, 2006 10:22 PM

Reminds me - I still have keys to your building.

(no subject)
posted by Fenton Crackshell on June 9th, 2006 12:00 AM

on the one hand i find this hilarious and sorta want to vote for it, but then i imagine myself in oliver's shoes, coughing up glitter while trying to clean it off my porch; though he seems to have a good sense of humor about it!

(no subject)
posted by Ink Tea on June 9th, 2006 12:16 AM

Dear Vlad,

Mr. Oliver enjoys getting angry almost as much as he enjoys making others angry. Besides, he was asking for it, dressed like that.


(no subject)
posted by beverly penn on June 9th, 2006 4:07 AM

Ink is right--glitter bombs and unicorns are just one way we here in Minneapolis show Oliver just how wonderful we think he is. No harm was intended, hence the glitter. Besides, when I saw him the other day, there was no evidence of the glitter actually having reached its desired destination, that being Oliver himself. All in good, sporting fun.

Ahhhhh, yes, I expected retribution. Of course, since this was in (granted, rather delayed) reaction to a former prank of yours and this Mean Jeannine business, I thought perhaps we could call it even. I should have known better!

Limited supplies. Glitter neccessary. Complication a magnetic force. Forgive me.


(no subject)
posted by Ink Tea on June 9th, 2006 7:15 AM

Oh, I understand about limited supplies and time, and about the necessity of glitter. I think you did a great job.

(no subject)
posted by Oliver X on June 9th, 2006 8:06 AM

You probably will not give me the satisfaction, but DID IT WORK?


a) Ink Tea got me similarly on my birthday, so I've been on the
lookout for such traps

b) I was definitely expecting something from someone (which is why I
made a point of leaving no keys behind)

c) I parked in the back so I was immediately tipped off and started
scouting around

d) But as I was doing so, Star 5 walked right into the trap with me
calling "look out!"

e) And then the string tore free

(no subject)
posted by Danger D. HotBod on June 9th, 2006 12:36 PM

i would be interested in knowing the details of why the trap failed so that it could be refined for possible future uses.

i also have glitter bomb design concepts and am especially interested in improvised glitter bomb techniques using common household items.

(no subject)
posted by beverly penn on June 9th, 2006 3:53 PM

Well, I tried my best. What more can I say. With only the porch to work with, my options were severely limited. I await my comeuppance with a rather curious mixture of apprehension and delight.

Danger: Let's talk.

(no subject)
posted by r0ck c4ndy on June 10th, 2006 4:40 PM

I've actually gotten glitter on both Oliver and his house, and I know the repercussions! I'm just soooooo happy to see so many of my favorite things at his house!! GENIUSSSSSSSS!