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ambitron indifornian
Level 1: 10 points
Alltime Score: 1592 points
Last Logged In: December 12th, 2007
BADGE: The Sweet Cheat Gone


retired

15 + 3 points

Go Camping by ambitron indifornian, Cameron, Orion

September 6th, 2006 5:48 PM

INSTRUCTIONS: Go camping. Commune with nature. Swim in a river (or lake if you prefer). Sit by a campfire and play charades. It's your camping trip, do what you want.

Cameron: Late last week, we dragged ourselves out of bed early, and drove to Austin Creek State Park.

It was a sorely needed vacation for me, and I had a blast. Our story is below in pictures, embellished and told non-chronologically for the sake of vaugely coherent narrative.

Thanks for camping with me, guys.

Orion: I'd never gone backpacking before...I think I strained muscles in my back I didn't even know were there. I also filled a "Titanium Spork" filled hole in my life that I didn't even know was there. Between run-ins with feral pigs, dodging poison oak, treacherous river crossings, and a pants-ripping tumble down a rocky hill, I've never had so much fun in the woods.

Amber: I think that I stumbled and fell over at least five times in the first hour, but it was well worth it. Being the only girl there, I listened to the gentlemen talk of video games, discuss sci fi books, and snore. But, really I got to see the stars (which, I generally never pay attention to), sit in a river, and put my stressful genius tests on back burner. Best part: Josh's gourmet pad thai!


Josh's Temporary Tale of Divinity: On the rock where we ate lunch; we dropped a thick slice of salami into the water. At first, we saw only fish sniffing at it and darting away. We figured that the strong salty meat was not tempting to them, and we soon ignored it. A short while later two California Newts came swimming by; we watched them closely, as they are a vanishing species. I remember them in my youth in great orange-red clots in the beds of rivers, but lately, I have seen few.

We watched the two companions swim towards the salami, sniffing gently at it. The larger wrapped his little hands around it and began to gnaw at the slice. The smaller began to become agitated and dart around, attempting to get a taste of his own, but the big one lashed at him and kept him away. Soon, Small Newt began to attack Big Newt, chewing at his tail and limbs, and soon a fight was underway.

We stood observing this in utter horror. We had introduced this element of luxury into thier perfect newt society, and it was all crumbling. Scenes from "The Gods Must Be Crazy" played in my head.

Would we come back in a year to find warring newt tribes, battling for control of the last bits of cured pork?

Would this be the impetus of some horrible evolution, where the newts learn to hunt the local feral pigs, and build rendering plants and slaughterhouses of sticks and twigs?

What had we done?

Josh took responsibility as giver of the Cured Meats and straddled the river, dipping his arm in to the deep pool.

I can only imagine the divine horror and teleological crisis of those newts as a giant pink thing entered thier world and removed the prize from between them. Thier fighting ceased, and they began to paw at the empty earth where the treasure had once been. In thier frantic search, they fought again, each blaming the other for the divine intervention.

But soon, they were left with nothing. The river was quiet and unttainted by mana from the heavens, and they continued on thier way, peaceful again.


1- Orion Was Angry.jpg
It was a off to a bad start. Orion was angry.

2 - Cam Was Knifey.jpg
Cam was knifey.

3 - Fog Burned Off.jpg
but the fog burned off...

4 - We Hiked.jpg
...we began to hike...

5 - Woods.jpg
...the woods were calming and magnificent.

6 - Ryan Surveys.jpg
Ryan, our Navy guide, surveyed the land.

7 - Beautiful Creek.jpg
We found a beautiful creek.

7 - Creek Lunch.jpg
And ate lunch.

8 - Our Meadow.jpg
We finally arrived at a beautiful meadow...

8.5 - Set Up Camp.jpg
... and set up camp.

9 - Cooked Food.jpg
Food was prepared, with hi-tech camping gadgets.

10 - Amber Doesn't Like Eggs.jpg
Amber was unamused by dehydrated eggs.

11 - Shrimp not shrimp.jpg
Josh brought Shrimp that magically tasted nothing like shirmp. But his backwoods Pad Thai was still marvelous.

12 - Poison Ryan.jpg
Ryan brokered a peace treaty with Posion Oak...

13 -Orion was Happy.jpg
Orion was happy...

14 - Cam was not at all knifey.jpg
Cam was not at all knifey...

15 - Sunset Moonrise.jpg
And as the sun set, we all slept well under the stars.

16 - Camping is great.jpg
Camping is great.

+ larger

1- Orion Was Angry.jpg
2 - Cam Was Knifey.jpg
3 - Fog Burned Off.jpg
4 - We Hiked.jpg
5 - Woods.jpg
6 - Ryan Surveys.jpg
7 - Beautiful Creek.jpg
7 - Creek Lunch.jpg
8 - Our Meadow.jpg
8.5 - Set Up Camp.jpg
9 - Cooked Food.jpg
10 - Amber Doesn't Like Eggs.jpg
11 - Shrimp not shrimp.jpg
12 - Poison Ryan.jpg
13 -Orion was Happy.jpg
14 - Cam was not at all knifey.jpg
15 - Sunset Moonrise.jpg
16 - Camping is great.jpg

1 vote(s)



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4 comment(s)

Camping Is Great
posted by Joshua Kelly on September 8th, 2006 9:02 PM

But you forgot to mention how I became a capricous salami god to those Newts.

(no subject)
posted by Ian Kizu-Blair on September 8th, 2006 11:21 PM

Orion, you look fly.

Amphibigod!
posted by Cameron on September 11th, 2006 1:15 PM

That is a story that deserves to be told. See Above.

(no subject)
posted by anna one on September 16th, 2006 10:39 AM

awww... happy newts!