I would like to apologize in advance for how completely offensive this is. Some things are just too inappropriate to be passed up.

Plastic Jesus came over to his mom's house to visit his homegirl, Bex, his mom's roomate. His mom had some friends over to play drinking speed scrabble. He knew St. Clair the patron saint of television and sore eyes, Buddha, St. YellowBear the Purified, Guadalupe and her kid Juan, Lord Shiva, and Saraswati. And he was introduced to this hot little number who was presented as Miss Magdalen.
He thought he remembered hearing something about her. She was brazenly dancing, undulating her hips in that hula skirt. "I think I had a dream about you," he said to her. She took his arm and led him off, leaning in close and whispering to the Plastic Lamb of God "Well, lets make your dreams come true then. I hear you're a carpenter; why don't you nail me against a cross, big guy." It was more temptation than the Plastic Son of God could bear.

"And cut! The lighting is way too harsh! Plastic Jesus, could you stop with the glowing heavenly luminance? And slap that bitch's ass a little more? Yeah, good. And Mary, quit saying 'oh God.' That's his dad. This is not that kind of flick."
Miss Bright directed the "documentary," positioning the participants and giving the "cinematographer" her angles. Bex once again found herself as resident SFØ pornographer, but it was all in the name of art, right?

I'm not sure, all I know is the hymn "Oh Come Thou Almighty King" is getting a whole new meaning in my head.