15 + 62 points
Sundial I by Augustus deCorbeau
July 18th, 2008 12:52 AM
This is an upgrade to Nesbitt Industries' Fusion-Powered* Portable Luncheon Warmifier, Mk. 1, in response to a comment by susy suıʞɹəp:
As there was already a nice big stake sticking straight up to accommodate the Adjustable Reflectifier, I took advantage of other local materials that were lying about on the ground (or as they say in the art world, "found objects") to perform an impromptu upgrade and add... a Time Machine!
Using advanced procedures* that transcended mathematics, I was able to construct a chronautic device to measure the very passage of time itself -- using nothing but twigs, seashells...
and SCIENCE!
There is a saying among the members of the Squaxin Island Tribe (on whose traditional lands this device happens to be located): "Time is when you get there". Therefore, I felt it appropriate to ignore the arbitrary units of hours or minutes, and instead measure time in units of "Are we there yet?**"-ness. As such, the arc traced by the shadow is divided roughly in half, into two units: Not time to eat yet, and Not time to leave yet.
Three sticks mark key moments along this temporal continuum:
The Nesbitt Industries' Fusion-Powered*** Portable Luncheon Warmifier, Mk. 2 was successfully field-tested with a buffalo chicken wrap, and the Chronotic Upgrade functioned flawlessly! (Except for one period during which it was cloudy, forcing the Chronotic Upgrade to go into standby mode to conserve power...)
In all, another glorious victory for SCIENCE!!
(and seashells and twigs)
and wombats
*poking a stick in the ground the day before at the start of the day, again at lunchtime, and finally at the end of the day
**No! And if you keep asking, I'm going to turn this car right around!
***via solar transmission
If hunger begins after a couple of hours and it takes three hours to warm-up your burrito then...
well, some conclusion must follow, right?
As there was already a nice big stake sticking straight up to accommodate the Adjustable Reflectifier, I took advantage of other local materials that were lying about on the ground (or as they say in the art world, "found objects") to perform an impromptu upgrade and add... a Time Machine!
Using advanced procedures* that transcended mathematics, I was able to construct a chronautic device to measure the very passage of time itself -- using nothing but twigs, seashells...
and SCIENCE!
There is a saying among the members of the Squaxin Island Tribe (on whose traditional lands this device happens to be located): "Time is when you get there". Therefore, I felt it appropriate to ignore the arbitrary units of hours or minutes, and instead measure time in units of "Are we there yet?**"-ness. As such, the arc traced by the shadow is divided roughly in half, into two units: Not time to eat yet, and Not time to leave yet.
Three sticks mark key moments along this temporal continuum:
- Begin Warmification: Retrieve Warmifier from storage shed and insert Luncheon
- Warmification Complete: Remove & Consume Luncheon
- Quittin' Time: Return Warmifier to storage shed
The Nesbitt Industries' Fusion-Powered*** Portable Luncheon Warmifier, Mk. 2 was successfully field-tested with a buffalo chicken wrap, and the Chronotic Upgrade functioned flawlessly! (Except for one period during which it was cloudy, forcing the Chronotic Upgrade to go into standby mode to conserve power...)
In all, another glorious victory for SCIENCE!!
(and seashells and twigs)
and wombats
*poking a stick in the ground the day before at the start of the day, again at lunchtime, and finally at the end of the day
**No! And if you keep asking, I'm going to turn this car right around!
***via solar transmission
13 vote(s)
5
teucer
5Haberley Mead
5Rainy
5Tøm
5Myrna Minx
5Jagganath
5susy derkins
5Bex.
5Optical Dave
5zer0gee
5[smedly]
5Rachel's Reflection
2Idøntity matrix
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posted by susy derkins on July 18th, 2008 11:20 AM
I want some Nesbitt Industries shares! Man, seashells...
I like that this task allowed you to use the technical term warmification again.