Thumb War by Pam, Betsy
November 1st, 2007 8:22 PMTaking a brief break from work the next day, I drafted and emailed a declaration of thumb war. As the rules of thumb-war-by-mail have never been ratified, my challenge included the condition that the SF0 community would adjudicate who won the thumb war.
Pam and I mailed each other our best strategies (and took pictures of what we received, posting them here).
Please comment in order to decide who won!
10/21/07: Diplomacy fails.
(Betsy:) It became clear on GMail Chat that we were headed for thumb war.
10/22/07: Declaration of War
(Betsy:) War is not to be entered into lightly. After sleeping on it, Betsy declared a thumb war on Pam.
10/22/07: turtle + thumb = <3
(Pam:) Ordinarily, a turtle would be at a disadvantage in a thumb war. Fortunately for me, I have a semi-autonomous detachable prosthetic thumb!
10/23/07: Stage one of the attack on Pam
(Betsy:) I decide to toy with Pam in my attack. At the top of the page, I remind her that I could have used finely-serrated attack paper to weaken her fighting thumb.
10/23/07: Second taunt in the attack on Pam's thumb.
(Betsy:) I send Pam my thumbprints, so she can see the massive thumbs she would have had to deal with, should I have chosen that tactic.
10/23/07: Pinning is winning.
(Betsy:) Enough toying with Pam. Although I could have staged a variety of attacks, the path to success is quite simple: I just need to pin her thumb. However, here I encountered the difficulty that her thumb was in Atlanta while my pin and I were in New York. However, Pam has had a weakness for the color purple for all 17 years I have known her. Thus, the purple glove I included (and labeled "Pam") unambiguously represented Pam in all matters, including representing her in this war. Knowing that I had the upper hand, I sat twiddling my (victorious) thumbs, waiting to see what Pam would try...
10/23/07: Quick, before Shakespeare sues...
(Betsy:) Though it is two days before St. Crispin's Day, I send off my simple but worthy attack with what Henry V surely would have said, had he been a thumb.
10/23/07: Pam's thumb army in the making
(Pam:) I decided to clone that thumb and send my adversary an entire thumb army! Given more time, I might have enlisted my roommate, who studies tissue engineering, to help me make actual clones grown in vats or whatever it is they grow clones in nowadays. But time was short... Fortunately, my background in human-computer interaction had taught me the value of paper prototypes!
10/23/07: Pam's army lies in wait....
(Pam:) I've known Betsy for a long time, so I knew of her weakness for popup books. I decided to capitalize on that. When the envelope is closed, the thumb army fits neatly inside.
10/23/07: CHAAAAAARGE!!!
(Pam:) And when she opens it, the army springs forth, ready to attack!
10/25/07: I can beat that.
(Pam:) Fortunately, I opened Betsy's envelope without my thumbs and was not pinned.
10/25/07: the pin undone
(Pam:) One of my ninja clones then made quick work of that pin.
10/29/07: Pam's offensive thumbs cower.
(Betsy:) Pam's pusillanimous paper pollices prove to be flatheads, quite easy to crush.
10/29/07: Pam's thumbs are divided and conquered.
(Betsy:) Alone, Pam's thumbs are just loudmouths and scaredy-cats. And ninjas. (But just paper thumb ninjas.)
11/1/07: Epilog: Assimilation.
(Betsy:) I've had to think hard what to do with all these defeated thumbs hanging around. Grateful for my clemency, some decided to be of use. (Roderigo here makes a good bookmark for light reading.)
11/1/07: Epilog II: Failure to thrive.
(Betsy:) A light-duty shredder can come in handy.
19 vote(s)
The Revolutionary
5
NHØ Bananapants
5
neon violent
5
Spidere
5
Loki
5
The Vixen
5
susy derkins
5
Charlie Fish
5
Meta tron
5
Jellybean of Thark
5
Blue
5
Bex.
5
Tøm
5
Secret Cello
5samuel vimes
5
Herbie Hatman
5Daniel Lyon
5
Heatherlynn
5
Cole E
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(none yet)9 comment(s)
A quality declaration, and impressive efforts on both sides! For me, it hinges on the cloned thumb army, which I think is amazing. It's a fearsome force...and yet, I am swayed by the assimilation via hug therapy and destruction via the shredder. I think I have to go with Pam--no, wait...I have to go with Betsy! Anyway, this was clearly a hard-fought battle. Well done!
A lovely completion, on both sides. Welcome to the game. This is a top notch first task!
Despite my fondness for the pinned purple glove concept, the phrase "whereas dada does n0t mean anything" in a formal document, and the most contextually appropriate Mr. Tyzik reference imaginable, I've got to cast my ballot for Pam. The popup thumb army is hard to beat.
Pam's thumb army gets my vote for making me laugh out loud and embarrass myself in front of my co-workers.
Gotta vote for a pop-up army! Though I applaud the straight forward lateral thinking of pinning the thumb - that is after all the ONLY way to win a thumb war.
I can't call on who won.
In the end, the thumb troopers were soundly beaten. As far as we can tell, Roderigo is the only survivor, the rest of his brothers likely sent to Thumbhalla.
Pam the Purple is a vicious adversary.
Modern warfare has changed a lot. Is this the TWII we've heard about?
In spite of the undeniable awesomeness of the psychological ops of the threatening thumb prints and Dadaness, pop-up thumb armies are pretty amazing.
Cloned thumbs are quite intimidating. Yet, how can one overlook that Pam was pinned?
Gonna have to side with the pinned purple thumb glove on this one.
I like the clones, but they prove weak when genetically engineered to that degree...