The word confuse has a few lesser-known meanings. One of these is "to assemble without order or sense; jumble."

Simple enough. Much simpler than causing a plant "to feel embarrassment," and easier on the conscience as well. An embarrassed plant is a sad plant. And I suspect that most plants already are "unable to think with clarity or act with intelligence or understanding," though I might be wrong.

I decided that I should not "bring to ruination" (archaic) any plants that were already alive. A quick trip to the grocery store, however, revealed a bounty of orderly-arranged plants ready to be jumbled together.

Voila... some very confused plants (and a healthy side dish as well)!