15 + 9 points
Keep Marching On by B 9, Captain Fluffyfart
February 23rd, 2009 9:59 PM
//ACQUIRING SIGNAL//
..
..
..
//LOGGING ON...//
... DONE
Welcome B9 - Doom Bot of the Apocalypse
Uploading results from task: KEEP MARCHING ON...
Upon reading the instructions for this task my processing piqued. Perhaps it was the inclusion of the word "DESTROY" in the instructions. Perhaps it was the virus in my memory files. Either way, I knew I had to complete the task.
As soon as my programming accepted the task I knew immediately what must be done. I had saved up many spent robot fuel cells, as they are part of a memory file containing robot parties. These were set to be eliminated in a most efficient fashion.
My human slave, TX845-1, set about his task of marking the spent fuel cells for incineration, cleverly placing them in a holding receptacle.
The flesh brains really do show signs of adequacy from time to time. It is good we allow them to live so as to eliminate the need for robotic manual labor. Despite these signs of mental activity, I assure you that his mandatory tasking uniform is in full free-will killing function.
The human slave proceeded to collect the incineration bags for destruction. Granted, not all waste was robot-related. It was trash day after all.
The human slave successfully disposed of the spent fuel cells, and satisfied the requirements of the task.
//DERIVATIVE ERROR >> SYNTAX BINARY LOOP FAULT//
Due to a looping error within my code I discovered a fault in the completion of this task. The instructions clearly state that I destroy a piece of my past. My human slave, TX845-1, completed the assignment, however I, my robot self, did not. Thus my programming concluded that I must eliminate my human slave.
He was a satisfactory flesh being, and his services have been useful to me for several years. TX845-1 you will be missed. That is, until I delete the memory files storing your existence.
//END LOG//
..
..
..
//LOGGING ON...//
... DONE
Welcome B9 - Doom Bot of the Apocalypse
Uploading results from task: KEEP MARCHING ON...
Upon reading the instructions for this task my processing piqued. Perhaps it was the inclusion of the word "DESTROY" in the instructions. Perhaps it was the virus in my memory files. Either way, I knew I had to complete the task.
As soon as my programming accepted the task I knew immediately what must be done. I had saved up many spent robot fuel cells, as they are part of a memory file containing robot parties. These were set to be eliminated in a most efficient fashion.
My human slave, TX845-1, set about his task of marking the spent fuel cells for incineration, cleverly placing them in a holding receptacle.
The flesh brains really do show signs of adequacy from time to time. It is good we allow them to live so as to eliminate the need for robotic manual labor. Despite these signs of mental activity, I assure you that his mandatory tasking uniform is in full free-will killing function.
The human slave proceeded to collect the incineration bags for destruction. Granted, not all waste was robot-related. It was trash day after all.
The human slave successfully disposed of the spent fuel cells, and satisfied the requirements of the task.
//DERIVATIVE ERROR >> SYNTAX BINARY LOOP FAULT//
Due to a looping error within my code I discovered a fault in the completion of this task. The instructions clearly state that I destroy a piece of my past. My human slave, TX845-1, completed the assignment, however I, my robot self, did not. Thus my programming concluded that I must eliminate my human slave.
He was a satisfactory flesh being, and his services have been useful to me for several years. TX845-1 you will be missed. That is, until I delete the memory files storing your existence.
//END LOG//
3 vote(s)
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(none yet)2 comment(s)
posted by B 9 on February 24th, 2009 12:42 PM
HAHAHAHAHA! That's fuckin' awesome! Never had my face on lolcat before... Don't quite know if this change is for the good or what...
TX845-1 in the last photo:
