25 + 10 points
Find Your Evil Twin by Water Dragon
July 5th, 2006 10:57 PM
So to start the search for my evil twin I decided to start where all good searches start: with google.
http://www.google.com/search?q=nick+palmer+evil+twin
The top result was for a band on MySpace. The fact that MySpace came up first is a sure sign of evil. Apparently from the google summary the band member with my name is in charge of "low frequencies".
So I followed the link thinking I might find my evil twin and was immediately struck by many signs of evil. The first sign was the banner add at the top of the page which was so visually annoying that my eyes started hurting. Certainly evil. I have included it here as evidence of evil.
Shortly after I managed to scroll the banner off the page my ears were accosted by sounds of the bands "music". Websites which make noise without you inviting it are just plain evil. What if I were surfing at work and the noise started suddenly alerting my boss to my slackitude and I got fired? The fact I don't have a real job doesn't make a difference. The song then called me a "Son of a Bitch". This is not a good way to start winning fans. Insulting people you don't know is just evil.
The next sign of evil came when I scrolled down the page and saw that there was a section of content that said "This feature requires flash player 8". Ignoring the fact that flash is almost always used for evil, requiring flash 8 which isn't available yet on any of the platforms I use is just evil.
Finally scrolling down further still we see the usual MySpace evil of flashing animated gifs. There was one however that I found particularly offensive that I have uploaded here as proof of the evil. Making fun of fat people having spaz attacks is evil. What's even more evil is the kid looks like he has Downs Syndrome which is even more evil to make fun of than just a fat kid.
Finally, they have a "download" link for the song that insulted me. But when I click on it I get a "filenotfound.mp3" file. It is evil to offer to allow people to download their music only to have it not work. I can stream the "SOB" song but I can't easily download it. Very evil.
http://www.google.com/search?q=nick+palmer+evil+twin
The top result was for a band on MySpace. The fact that MySpace came up first is a sure sign of evil. Apparently from the google summary the band member with my name is in charge of "low frequencies".
So I followed the link thinking I might find my evil twin and was immediately struck by many signs of evil. The first sign was the banner add at the top of the page which was so visually annoying that my eyes started hurting. Certainly evil. I have included it here as evidence of evil.
Shortly after I managed to scroll the banner off the page my ears were accosted by sounds of the bands "music". Websites which make noise without you inviting it are just plain evil. What if I were surfing at work and the noise started suddenly alerting my boss to my slackitude and I got fired? The fact I don't have a real job doesn't make a difference. The song then called me a "Son of a Bitch". This is not a good way to start winning fans. Insulting people you don't know is just evil.
The next sign of evil came when I scrolled down the page and saw that there was a section of content that said "This feature requires flash player 8". Ignoring the fact that flash is almost always used for evil, requiring flash 8 which isn't available yet on any of the platforms I use is just evil.
Finally scrolling down further still we see the usual MySpace evil of flashing animated gifs. There was one however that I found particularly offensive that I have uploaded here as proof of the evil. Making fun of fat people having spaz attacks is evil. What's even more evil is the kid looks like he has Downs Syndrome which is even more evil to make fun of than just a fat kid.
Finally, they have a "download" link for the song that insulted me. But when I click on it I get a "filenotfound.mp3" file. It is evil to offer to allow people to download their music only to have it not work. I can stream the "SOB" song but I can't easily download it. Very evil.
And I've always hated that gif, for the same reasons you list.