Shopping Commentator by Saint, Mr. T., The C
June 10th, 2007 9:16 PMOne thing you'll notice is that the jokes got less sexual as we continued on.
Also, I just noticed Saint spelled Meats as "Meets" Never gonna let him live that down.
(most picture comments made by Saint)
--Saint
Hello, hello all my fellow SF0's, this task was extremely fun to do, not to mention "stimulating" if you know what I mean, HA! Just joking. I will just say now that I take full responsibility for pretty much every sexual sticky note that was written during the completion of this task. No, I do not have a sick mind, it's just that a lot of store items are provocative in that way sometimes. Anyway, since I seem to be the long-winded writer of the bunch, I better place this proof in a good light, and fully describe the experience as best I can. It all started on a normal day after school, I was going to hang out with my good friends, and fellow SF0's, Mr.T., and The C. Then, like most times that I am around these two, I started getting the drive, and I brought up the idea to complete this task. Of course they both agreed it was a good idea, and so we were off to The C's house to collect a couple pads of sticky notes (he has quite a few, as all of you may already know, from his labeling compulsion). Then we drove off to our first destination, Safeway. We chose Safeway because it was further from our houses, and there was less a chance that we'd be recognized while writing obscene things on sticky notes and adhering them to food items. After placing many strange works of literary genius all around Safeway, we decided to make our move on the nearby Albertson's. Though this was a much riskier attack, as we lived closer to it, in the long run it was well worth it (I bought a baguette). With my quick wit, and unmatchable ability to come up with the most random shit on the spot, The C's already well known labeling skills, and Mr. T.'s pure insanity, we managed to create quite an interesting shopping experience for those to follow us.
Good stuff
thats all i have to say
"Pregnant with anxiety"
The C has an interesting mind sometimes
"now cures genital herpes"
I bet someone buys it!
Leather Gloves "made with real human skin"
One of my faves (Saint)
"not your eaverage dead family pets"
This one took some thinking to figure out, Mr.T just works that way.
"15% off for all convicted arsonists"
Good marketing if you ask me
Sort of a media joke
a little bit less than pc i know...
what can I say, they do!
Ahhh...
Well...DO YA!?
Mmm, good
"now with 15% more dog"
Nothing says breakfast like that!
"Organics= Dirt+water
The true definition of organic
"now racially charged"
I guess it's being stereotypically asian?
"3 minutes is NOT instant"
very true...
"whities"
definitely...
"comes with free bottle of Vagisil"
Some poor girl is totally scarred because of me, HA!
HAHA, ground zero...
and creepy guy...
Can you say VROOM!
Mr.T. scares me too...
Albertsons
...um, yeah...
"mine is beefier"
I agree
I spelled meats wrong, damn
Mmm, sauteed
"works well on small animals"
really it does...
"do not apply to eyes"
A good warning if you ask me.
Seriously though, don't
Use them on you sleeping friends, much better feeling for you.
Lobsters
What can I say, they have feelings too
I guess there were lobster women in the other tank...
Freakin horny crustaceans!!!
"add women for party"
I myself am against alcohol, but this is for the consumer to read, not me.
"cures cancer"
Inside joke, but if you have cancer, inject soma dis!
"For all your bloody messes"
I actually have several of these for just that reason.
"gynecologist recommended"
When you get the finger, wouldn't you like it to be professional!? (yes, we spelled it wrong)
"do not inhale"
Truly a dumb thing to do
Really, need he?
It doesn't leave much to the imagination
Mr. T. being sexy...
Hmmm....
Did you know that i could flip reality sideways?
I am that awesome!
The C looking high and mighty among all that Pennzoil
Mmm, Pennzoil...
"except for std's"
Dora the explorer, crapiest kidshow since bob the builder!
'Not a suppository"
Para:DON'T STICK LIGHTBULB IN ASS!!!
"does not cure acne"
Just in case you were wondering
Man I have bad hair!!!
I can't delete this picture!!!...
"Grandma won't know the difference"
She probably won't if we put it in a blender
"free my brethren!"
The C obviously is a little attached to his post-its
"you may keep the gonorhea with my appologies"
safely inserted into a love poem card
YAY!
And tucked away on the romance rack
even more YAY!
9 vote(s)
YellowBear
5
Blue
5
Radioactive Cheese
5
Lincøln
5
Darkaardvark
5
Hank Manolo
5
Caitlin of DOOM!
5
Doctor Cello
5
Ben Yamiin
Terms
(none yet)4 comment(s)
It's alright. But some of the remarks aren't as witty as some others.
Free my brethren is great though, you should be fighting over the rights to paaaaarrrrty for that one.
"Do not apply to eyes."
But its good in your head.
I refuse to be told that I cannot put pudding in my eyes!!! But, I have lots of respect for all people that have enough balls to do this task. Very amuseing, wish I could unknowingly go into a supermarket after someone has done this. "Free my breathren" is classic. Well done.