I dug my hopelessly out-of-date digital out of my desk drawer, but the batteries were dead. I was forced to toss a pair into the charger and let them brood overnight.

When the light blinked off, I popped out my power source, dropped the batteries in the cam, and then remembered that I had a fucking webcam and I'd just wasted my time (and electricity). So I rubbed the excess eyeliner out from under my eyes, sat in front of my PC, and clicked "Take Photo."

The results, ladies and gents, are in.
(And I desperately need a haircut).