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Joseph Fitzgerald
Level 1: 10 points
Alltime Score: 205 points
Last Logged In: May 2nd, 2008
TEAM: Pants TEAM: Perplex City


retired

15 + 60 points

Make It Work by Joseph Fitzgerald

February 7th, 2008 11:21 AM / Location: 37.764302,-122.2710

INSTRUCTIONS: Make it work.

My chair broke. =[


It was once a standard office chair, it raised, it lowered, it was comfortable. Then it broke. Right where the chair itself connected to the lift mechanism. For further understanding, i have posted a technical breakdown as follows:

"Cushion bone connected to lift-mechanism bone. Lift-mechanism bone connected to, support-leg bones. Support-leg bones connected to, caster bones. Caster bones connected to wheel bones. And thats all the bones in my chair!!!"

Now, with your understanding of my chair firmly cemented in your mind, you will now know why it was such a tragedy when the support snapped right where it did. Sure, it could still function as a chair, with soft supple padding and both back and hand rests, but with out the lift mechanism, all elevation was lost! How could i reach the keyboard, see the monitor, or post praxis!?

I couldn't. Thats how. In simpler words, my chair did not work.

Science must be attempted. Dark rituals must be preformed. Sacrifices must be made! Through the unholy union of a preexisting stool and the decaying remains of my computer chair, i present to you our new path to transcend beyond the fear of (chair)death!!!

Those of you with weak hearts should not gaze upon:

Franken-Chair!




-=EDIT=-= 02/09/2008CE =-

After prompting by Mrs. Derkins, I had to. I couldn't imagine my life without this addition, it kept me up at night. One side of my mind angry for missing such a blatant oversight, the other side of my mind wildly giddy with the thought of adding to my abomination.

A simple task of removing the plastic nubs at the bottom of the stool and creating a hole in them using a large knife spun around quite vigorously (with no personal harm i might add. rats. ) Popped prexisting casters to place. PERFECTION!

i now present to you a brand new level of Franken Chair Technologies:





- smaller

IT LIVES!

IT LIVES!


From the underside, attaching hardware instaled to preexisting threaded holes.

From the underside, attaching hardware instaled to preexisting threaded holes.


The legs had to be bent outward to provide stability

The legs had to be bent outward to provide stability


Success, it now works!

Success, it now works!

Sadly, very few people wish to sit in the frankenchair (myself included). something about the apparent instability, however, i think this is attributed to most people being put off as it is an abomination of office furniture alchemy


Caster + Stool Nubben

Caster + Stool Nubben


Rolling Daddy Long Legs' Legs of Death!

Rolling Daddy Long Legs' Legs of Death!


Now no one, NO ONE I SAY!!! WILL DARE to sit in frankenchair!

Now no one, NO ONE I SAY!!! WILL DARE to sit in frankenchair!

But hey, I can move it out of the way a lot easier now when we have company.



12 vote(s)



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6 comment(s)

(no subject)
posted by Lizard Boy on February 7th, 2008 1:25 PM

Very nice work. I like to see productive things come out of praxis.

(no subject)
posted by Tøm on February 7th, 2008 1:31 PM

Vote for the term 'Frankenchair'


And the awesome seat of course.

(no subject)
posted by Coreopsis Major Bloden Melen on February 7th, 2008 2:14 PM

Vote for bravery and the chimeric looking chair you made!

(no subject)
posted by susy derkins on February 7th, 2008 8:20 PM

Spidery! Could you put the casters on?

wow
posted by Quirk of Nature on February 7th, 2008 11:44 PM

i was skeptical there, but you came through in the end. that is one bizarre looking chair. i laughed. nice write-up.

(no subject)
posted by Joseph Fitzgerald on February 8th, 2008 6:29 AM

Could you put the casters on?


!!!!!!!
didnt think about that! must.... attempt.... tonight....