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YellowBear
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75 + 125 points

Man vs. Machine by YellowBear, Fonne Tayne, Rainbow Bright

June 16th, 2007 4:50 PM

INSTRUCTIONS: Challenge a cable car to a footrace.

Start from the beginning of a cable car's route. Following the tracks, attempt to make it to the end of the route before it makes it there. Award the winner a medal.

Extra points for racing paraphernalia (numbers, starter gun, etc.)

If you are not in San Francisco, you can try this with other public transportation, but keep in mind that all participants must follow the same route. Subways may be a little dangerous.

Defy takes 1.6 miles in stride

Starts off slow but flies by
'toughest block on the system'


San Francisco-
Defythelie judged things perfectly. Winding up the pace with four blocks to run, she made a race-winning kick after passing PreFontaine just beyond the Pacific Union Club.

Ms. the Lie had hit the first few blocks with a strong pace, but held back slightly, finishing ahead at Van Ness by a clear block. That locked in the win on this season's first Man vs. Machine event.

"It was like the whole world was shouting over the last 100 yards," Defy told SF0. "I can't believe they called it 'man vs. machine! Just goes to show..."

Pre Fontaine held second, with Carl Lewis third out of the 17 runners.

Yesterday's event, held as part of a collaborative task, aimed to measure the abilities of pedal versus mechanic transport. The cable cars of the California, Market, & Van Ness line were chosen earlier this week as the competition, and are predicted to often make the run from 15 to 16 minutes, depending on traffic.

The winning time was a record 13 minutes and 32 seconds. The cable car in question was #53, departing at 5:44 pm.

Friday's race was delayed from 5:30 after a false start, and there was turmoil at the corner of Drumm street. Mr. Lewis spontaneously chucked a 200 ml flask of Jack Daniels at a small group of passersby, who had the gall to question his right to have a smoke at the start. But the Bear was still able to treat the downtown crowd to his trademark flying dismount.

He made it up through the block at Powell street, known to cable car operators as "the toughest in the system." From there he launched himself onto the car, rode with it past Grace Cathedral and over the crest of Nob Hill. After vomiting profusely, Mr. Lewis proceeded to finish the race on foot, well ahead of the car, and only floundering in the last hundred yards.

His photo finish almost didn't happen, as he ended up only about two seconds ahead of #53.

The other two races in the trifecta - the Powell-Hyde and Powell-Mason - have yet to be scheduled. However, today's runners appear eager to make it happen. "We'll take any challengers - any time, any day" said Mr. Lewis, with Mr. Fontaine nodding in agreement. "Just as long as they buy me a Boddington's after it's over."

A medal will be awarded for a winner of all three routes. For the time being, it seems, liquid winnings suffice.







For further car information see here.


+ larger

#53
Cable Car
Cable Car Works
Edinburgh Transport Trams 1899 Cable Car Trial Run
palladia always.JPG
california-cable-car.png
Up California
Stretched And Ready
rainbow_finger.jpg
Starting Line
2 blocks.jpg
After 8 Blocks
Defy Cape
view from tha nob.JPG
Nob Hill
The Finish Line
We Have Our Winner!
quinta-d'liz.jpg
3 yard finish.JPG
Win, Place, Show
Ridin' Back
554653406_a27542694e.jpg
1972
Miss Cable Car 1972
bra up top.JPG
drankin.jpg

25 vote(s)



Terms

(none yet)

25 comment(s)

(no subject)
posted by Burn Unit on June 16th, 2007 7:00 PM

Defythelie's pose at the finish: hot.
Faux-Pre moustache: even hawtter.

Seriously though, spot on. And double awesome that it was a woman who won, defeating both man AND machine.

Did the cable car know it had been challenged, btw?

I can dig it…
posted by Blue on June 16th, 2007 7:49 PM

But Whiskey Tango Foxtrot???
quinta-dliz19769.jpg
Dig the vintage photo's but what does this have to do with anything…
Does it represent to Jag offs(Jackasses) who are WAAAAAAY out of the race?

Sure did....
posted by Rainbow Bright on June 16th, 2007 8:31 PM

We told the cable car from the get go that he was being challenged. And he thought we couldn't beat him.....ha, we laugh in the face of adversity.

(no subject)
posted by YellowBear on June 17th, 2007 2:32 AM

(Aka. Carl Lewis) I think that the donkeys are in the write up to visually separate my effort from that of my victorious compatriots. But I feel no shame in having cheated. You just can't beat a photo finish!

(no subject)
posted by Ziggy C. on June 17th, 2007 11:49 AM

I love this. The writing style, the effort, the pictures, everything. Freakin' awesome.

(no subject)
posted by Fonne Tayne on June 18th, 2007 11:40 AM

yellowbear, are those your donkeys? i don't know where they came from.

it looks like marin.

(no subject)
posted by Jellybean of Thark on June 18th, 2007 5:54 PM

This gives me hope.

The humans have a fighting chance.

When the robots rise up against us, by gum, we'll give 'em a fight they'll remember.

(no subject)
posted by Fonne Tayne on June 18th, 2007 7:52 PM

and burn, are you claiming i'm a faux pre?

i'll show you a mustache.

(no subject)
posted by YellowBear on June 18th, 2007 10:47 PM

Yeah, as a matter of fact those are my donkeys. But it looks like someone moved them in the picture order. (Which I re-ordered again : P ) They are supposed to be in front of me. you forgot to mention how I harnessed them to pull me up along side the Cable Car before diving onto it. And of course the "Trademark Flying Dismount" simply wouldnt be possible without them. **Chucks an empty bottle of Jack at his donkeys**

yellowbearhates19948.jpg

(no subject)
posted by Fonne Tayne on June 29th, 2007 1:31 AM

T-PAIN GOT MONEY IN THA BANK

(no subject)
posted by YellowBear on June 29th, 2007 1:46 AM

DRAAANNKK!

BYOD TO THE DRANK
posted by Fonne Tayne on June 29th, 2007 2:08 AM

gotta pay attention to the little details...

cablecarhang21176.jpg

that looks like a byod t-shirt to me

(no subject)
posted by Malaysian Eddy on July 8th, 2007 10:16 PM

Nice stash man....this rocks!

(no subject)
posted by Fonne Tayne on June 13th, 2008 3:48 PM

now... it may be a little late to make it happen for this bloomsday...


but would anyone challenge the cable car and I for another run? anyone?

(no subject)
posted by Lank on June 13th, 2008 8:01 PM

Up for it.

(no subject)
posted by Fonne Tayne on June 13th, 2008 4:34 PM

hey! don't just vote, say you'll run!

(no subject)
posted by Fonne Tayne on June 13th, 2008 4:34 PM

i'll even provide the winnings !

(no subject)
posted by Minch on June 13th, 2008 5:25 PM

will you wear that sexy dead rat... i mean mustache... again?

(no subject)
posted by Fonne Tayne on June 13th, 2008 5:32 PM

har har har.

yes.

(no subject)
posted by Minch on June 13th, 2008 5:34 PM

oh, well then, hot damn i'm in...

(no subject)
posted by Minch on June 13th, 2008 5:34 PM

even if it's just to laugh uncontrollably at you

(no subject)
posted by Minch on June 13th, 2008 5:38 PM

err... with you...

(no subject) -1
posted by Ben Yamiin on June 13th, 2008 6:01 PM

I've always been taken with the philosophy that if you write a task, you shouldn't be the one completing it.

At least, that'll get me out of a cable-car run.

(no subject)
posted by Fonne Tayne on June 13th, 2008 6:03 PM

No it won't !

(no subject) +1
posted by YellowBear on June 13th, 2008 9:12 PM

This is harder than it looks, and hard than you think...