Paper Work by Borgasm, Rin Brooker
April 9th, 2010 12:46 AM / Location: 64.858483,-147.8306~Music for your enjoyment...it fits the task. Trust us.
Hello again, sf0...it's been a while. No, I haven't forgotten you. It's not you, it's me. I changed. But I'm back now and I'm going to make everything better...with a praxi that will make you ROTFL. -Borg
Rin: Now that I have new gloves I am back in the game! Borg was free tonight so I seduced her with words of adventures and high scores.
Borg: Our night began in Rin's room, where we debated which task to do. We wanted to bring our friend Dylan tasking with us, but he had the NERVE to already have plans for the night. As we pondered, Rin's "roommate," a life-size cardboard cutout of Edward Cullen fell over. We suddenly knew what task we needed to do.
We decided to carry Edward around campus as a (poor) substitute for Dylan. While we adventured, we would replace other people (and sometimes mannequins) with Edward. Unsurprisingly, a lot of people refused to be photographed with the "sparkletard" Twilight guy. While we completely understood (Rin and I hate Twilight, I with a fiery passion that courses through my veins with the white-hot intensity of a thousand burning suns and Rin with uncontrollable gagging), we used this as an opportunity to poke fun at him. We took him to the library, the campus convenience store, and the theater department (where they were just finishing up a rehearsal of Vinegar Tom, lucky us!). It was a lot of fun and we got to introduce Edward to a lot of people.
The following pictures are our proof that tonight, Edward Cullen was more useful than he has ever been in his life, ever. Although he was just about as creepy.
I feel pretty!
Edward secretly wants to be a colonial wife/geisha.
Mmm
Nothing's sexier than a bipolar emo stalker 108-year-old virgin vampire!
Emo luff
Awwe
Replacement #1
Desk Attendants don't have a very difficult job. So, could a man made of cardboard do it?
Harro Der!
Yes.
Replacement #2
Bitch, make me a sandwich! -We swapped one of the Subway employees with Edward.
New employee
What kind of bread do you want?
Job Training
Picking out a drink
Aww....they're all out of blood bags. *tear*
Replacement #3
We replaced her boyfriend with Edward. She didn't seem to mind.
Replacement #4
We swapped a member of this hacky-sack group with Edward. He sucks at this game.
"DAMMIT, EDWARD!
If you're not gonna try, get the fuck outta the circle!!!"
Replacement #5
I swear to God, the whole time we were tasking, he would NOT stop staring at my chest. ;_; I felt so dirty...
Replacement #6
We took Edward to dance club because we heard they need more guys...but immediately he was claimed by a guy.
He's not a good lead...
But he's easy to dip.
Oh, Edward~
Let me be your Bella
Play him like a guitar, girl!
Don't drop her!
Edward sucks at this move.
Luckily...
Some people can dance with even the most stiff dance partner.
Popular, eh?
he got along well with the dancers.
Replacement #7
We replaced one of Borg's costume teacher's mannequins with Edward. He looked fabulous.
Replacement #8
Perhaps the most significant event in Edward's life...receiving an acting lesson from a real director!
Gettin' fresh
Put him in a sultan wig and all of a sudden he's a ladies' man...hmm....
Replacement #9
He fits right in at the library.
???
This guy wanted to lick the "sparklefaggot." So, doesn't that make him one as well...?
And a kick for good measure.
"You stole my boyfriend!!!"
Carrying him around
Edward got to experience campus life tonight. We were most proud of him.
23 vote(s)
Sombrero Guy
3
relet 裁判長
4
Skitz Ø
5
teucer
5
Dan |ØwO|
5
Burn Unit
5
Picø ҉ ØwO
5
Pixie
2
Myrna Minx
5
Samantha
3
Boreal Nemeton
5
rongo rongo
2
Spidere
4
fjshie
5
Quatarious
3
Goddess of Doom and Thievery
5
susy derkins
5
Brock Dubbels
5
Harry Lee
5
LittleMonk
5
Flybug
4
Minch
5
Capricious Chicky
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nonplayers13 comment(s)
My little brother gave it to me for my birthday because I complained about being lonely.
never misses a connection
Vote for mocking Twilight, humorous photos, and because Voltaire is awesome.
Voltaire is playing CONvergence this year.
all ancillary comments aside: this makes me larff and larff.
"harro der!"
BAAAHAHAHAHA
In my head, Edward has a doofus voice, and his favourite expression is "HERP DERP!!!" This picture is my cell phone background at the moment. :P
I was hesitant when reading the descriptions, but the photos made me lol a lot.
I think that if I found myself ordering a sandwich from some sparkly vampire, I may indeed leave the establishment and question my dignity.
That being said, excellent job.
It's good to see you back! Nice idea too, although I'd question the reasoning behind owning such a cardboard cutout in the first place...
Also, I know another slightly relevant song by our old friend Ben Forbes.