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Mister Opinion
Level 2: 85 points
Last Logged In: September 5th, 2010
TEAM: Casting Call TEAM: team cøøking! Society For Nihilistic Intent And Disruptive Efforts Rank 1: Anti


15 + 55 points

Puns of the Navarone by Mister Opinion

December 3rd, 2008 4:25 PM

INSTRUCTIONS: Create a real world version of a pun, word play, or bad joke.

When given the challenge to realize a pun of some sort, my normally sedentary brain lept into action. After chasing it around the house and stuffing it back into my brain-pan, I fell to a-pondering. What could I do which would be both clever enough to amuse others and cause Morte to groan and regret ever having drawn me up from the primordial ooze (or it's modern analog). It could have been that I was making polenta that day, which lead me to this (by cornmeal → cornbread → which are square → but not pie), but clearly

A(pple) = π r2

- smaller

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A mixture of golden delicious, courtland, and ambrosia apples. Coffee is key.


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1 c. sugar, about 1/3 c. AP flour, cinnamon, nutmeg, ginger, butter


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Everything plus about 1-1/2 c. fresh cranberries and maybe a cup of white wine.



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My rolling pin is bigger than yours. I am not compensating.


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Top and bottom crust. Square baking dish.


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About to hit the oven (425F). "Roll it and crimp it, and mark it with pi, and put it in the oven quick or I'll die!"


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Bake faster! (25 minutes at 425, then about 35 at 375 until internal center temp reaches 180F)


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Glory and trumpets. And cheese.


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The final product. Of course, as is the way of pie, this piece looks dramatically worse than the second one will. It certainly was tasty though.



15 vote(s)



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awesomefirst

21 comment(s)

This is what happens....
posted by Morte on December 3rd, 2008 6:50 PM

.....when science geeks also are awesome chefs.

I love you. And that looks really really tasty. And now the texts make sense.....

Silly.

Now I want pie. Or Pi. Either way.

(no subject)
posted by Mister Opinion on December 3rd, 2008 7:00 PM

I'll be up all night darlin'. All you need to do is trudge your glorious becasted self the 100 miles through the snowstorm between you and my pie and pi and sure as Bjorn Strongarm's Your Uncle, you're all set. And then I'd be all set, too.

That's Kopps's Praline Pumpkin Pie custard on the plate with the pie, too.

Your cat will not leave me be to work.

(no subject)
posted by Mister Opinion on December 3rd, 2008 7:05 PM

It would have been more nearly perfect though, had I any minute tapioca or had I thought to use arrowroot starch instead of flour, but I was out and really wanted to get this done.

(no subject)
posted by Morte on December 3rd, 2008 7:15 PM

Bastard!!! Foul tempter!!! Pie-maker of the Damned!!!!!

My cat? Hah!!!!! That ship sailed a year ago, bucko!

(no subject)
posted by Mister Opinion on December 3rd, 2008 7:21 PM

Thou who are well and truly damned, I will always make you pie, and bring it to you on just the right plate, and with milk (or tea).

No, seriously. She's being a total pest today. Perhaps we're due for an earthquake, or The Zombie Apocalypse!!!

(no subject)
posted by Morte on December 3rd, 2008 7:30 PM

Even strawberry-rhubarb pie?

I have nothing to say as to the actions of my alleged cat.

(no subject)
posted by Mister Opinion on December 3rd, 2008 7:35 PM

Even strawberry-rhubabrb, the sweet pie made from an herb and a vegetable. I prefer rhubarb-custard myself, but I'm pie-flexible.

(no subject)
posted by Mister Opinion on December 3rd, 2008 8:39 PM

And are you denying that she is indeed a cat? I would hope that there is no allegedness about that at least... What do you know that I don't? Is she some sort of feline homunculus? Wee furry cat-demon? Rev'nooer?

(no subject)
posted by Morte on December 4th, 2008 8:28 AM

I say nothing. You accepted the transaction, no returns. Thank you have a nice day.

(no subject)
posted by Mister Opinion on December 4th, 2008 10:55 AM

Oh, I see how it is. Now everything makes sense. The cat, Antarctica, Don Rickles... I'll see you in two weeks (on the field...err...sofa of honor!)!

(no subject)
posted by Secret Agent on December 3rd, 2008 7:11 PM

Wow, that makes me hungry. Need to learn how to make my own crusts.

(no subject)
posted by Morte on December 3rd, 2008 7:16 PM

Hey, SF0 Skill Share opportunity right there!

(no subject)
posted by Mister Opinion on December 3rd, 2008 7:18 PM

I'm pretty critical of other people in the kitchen, but even I will not criticize you for buying pre-made crusts at the grocery store. Especially if you re-use the pie tins for random cooking accessories.

(no subject)
posted by Secret Agent on December 3rd, 2008 7:32 PM

That's awfully generous of you. I won't go that far--I roll my own, but from a packet of store bought pastry dough. The Tesco's puff pastry is pretty versatile. I can get decent sweet or savoury pies out of it, but it'd be nice to be able to go that little bit further.

(no subject)
posted by Mister Opinion on December 3rd, 2008 7:41 PM

Ah, but puff pastry doesn't make pie. It makes... something else. Don't get me wrong, I love it and use it all the time. I will also divulge that my Dear Sainted Mum gives me a dozen disks of pre-made crusts which I just roll out at a go which I keep in the freezer, which is about my year's supply of pie crust needs, because I *hate* making pie crust. It's not hard in any case, you can just follow the instructions in any reasonable cookbook, as long as you only use lard or vegetable shortenning (butter contains too much water).

(no subject)
posted by Scooter Vagabond on December 5th, 2008 2:21 AM

Given the shape of the slice, I see that you managed to cut it into an irrational number of pieces.

(no subject)
posted by Mister Opinion on December 5th, 2008 9:12 AM

Aye, it's complex.

(no subject)
posted by rongo rongo on December 6th, 2008 8:17 PM

A square pi? That's funny.

(no subject)
posted by Mister Opinion on December 6th, 2008 8:34 PM

Thanks! I try. Of course, I succeed better when I don't try.

(no subject)
posted by Morse Kode on December 18th, 2008 6:29 AM

can't go wrong with pi pie.

(no subject)
posted by Eidhnean entwines on May 22nd, 2009 11:32 PM

Science! And pi(e)! And Bjorn Stronginthearm!

(But no piᵉ)