When I first read this task, my immediate thought was 'How would you make a mustache out of epics?' Then I remembered something from the 3rd grade, wherein a teacher had us write poetry in a way that the words formed the shape of what the poem was about... Eureka! So I decided to go with the four most basic mustache shapes, and the first three epic poems that popped into my head, Xanadu, the Iliad, and Beowulf. I conned Cristos Bryer into helping me with this, unbeknownst to him until I told him he was doing it...

We went out to dinner at a local restaurant and proceeded to discuss shapes.



Many were drawn and discarded, until we hit upon the four perfect ones. And lo, we worked mightily under the lights of the diner, toiling with our markers and paper to do great injustice to these classics of literature!



And behold, we soon came to an end of the writin' and a start of the cuttin'.



Many positions were tried and laughed verily-eth at.



But it twas for naught, for the paper was too limp and the 'staches were not stiff, and therefore not Epic.



So, it was then decided that these upper lips needed stiffening. This came in the form of tape and bamboo skewers I found in my junk drawer.



Thusly appropriate stiffness was obtained for our creations, and herein modeled by the heroic Cristos (who actually does have a mustache, and quite frankly put up with a lot while I was taking pictures) we do henceforth and wherewithinethethetheth presenteth...

THE EPIC MUSTACHES!!!!!!!!