I set out on the finest day of April. It was the day before easter, and I was pretty pissed. See, every Saturday I have to do my chores, which usually take about 30 minutes or more. This sucks because its a serious waste of time because they just get dirty again in the next hour or so. Anyway, I was feeling insubordinate about doing them, so I sulked for a good 10 minutes and decided to do them how I felt they should be done. Pretty much, imagine an elephant stampede but in stead of trunks they've got vacuums. Thats how it went down, and I got the chores done in 10 minutes. I was still pissed for some reason, so i put some shoes on and decided to abandon my friend, Death Cube, while he was incapacitated by video games. In my opinion, this is one of his flaws, and I was sort've fed up with it. Anyway, I left on my bike to find something untouched in a century in the fair town of Portland, Oregon.

On my journey, I found nothing untouched. Nothing was ancient, or old, or even retro. But one thing I saw among the fantastic culture of The Saturday Market, was that everything was constantly changing. I found the exact inverse of what I was looking for, and because of this I found happiness in the day. I've had days where I accomplish many things and days where I accomplish none. Today was both of those things.

On another note, what I said directly above is false. But also true. I found that the culture of Portland is untouched. It has and always will be the weirdest city on the planet.