When whatever divine creator there is started handing out body parts, I was in the back browsing webcomics.

The body
It's weird, it can go horribly wrong, and horribly right. Mine happens to have gone horribly wrong, and whilst I understand there are people out there that have got it much worse than me, and that none of my 'wrong' things are particularly incapacitating (apart from one perhaps), but they still annoy me, and they are odd, and that makes them perfect for this task. Maybe I'll find something else that's weird eh?

Eyes
Lets start with the weirdest and most disabilitating thing first. My eyes. I have Nystagmus, rendering my vision terrible. I can't see far away, I can't see close up, I occasionally see double, I occasionally wobbly, I get headaches because of them and they water, a lot.

Nystagmus is, according to wikipedia, "involuntary eye movement that can be part of the vestibulo-ocular reflex (VOR) or it can be part of a pathological process. It is characterized by alternating smooth pursuit in one direction and a saccadic movement in the other direction." Or put basically, my eyes wobble. The only reason I don't see shaky, is because my brain has compensated for it, and even that doesn't work when I'm tired. Glasses don't work I was made to try them when I was younger to stop the headaches, but they made them worse. I can't ever drive, but I'm not impaired enough to count as partially sighted, so no free bus travel for me. Oh well.

Another annoying thing about this is that my head also shakes, in the opposite direction. Which is incredibly annoying when you realise it and can't stop it. Gah.

Nose and Throat
My nose and throat are screwy too, I have enlarged Adanoid glands, which causes shortness of breath, which causes me to breath very deeply. Which annoys people, including me when I notice it. These get infected quite a lot too, so lots of painful swallowing. My nose seems to have been inherited, my mother has had several operations on her nose, all of which have been unsuccessful, and like me, is on daily medication for it. The nose being unable to be breathed though doesn't help my heavy breathing either.

Teeth
Cack teeth, 'nuf said. But they're getting fixed now, so that's ok.

Hands
This is weird too. Look at your palms, and half fold your hand. You see the deep lines? You'll have two or three of them. I have one. On both hands. I've yet to meet anyone else with just one deep line on each hand.

Feet
Whilst mine can't compete with Lincoln's, they're pretty horrible compared to the amount of physical activity I do (very little). I found quite a deep cut on my second last left toe, which is new. I don't know where that came from. Also, my second toes are both bigger than my big toes, and that definitely runs in the family. I also found a bruise on my Ankle whilst I was down there, which is also unexplainable.


So yes, I'm a wobbly blind deep sea diver with ruin-like teeth and hands that were cut off at birth and stuck back on.