When we set out to accomplish this task, we brainstormed a few ideas. Ultimately, it was Entropic who suggested that we interpret this task to mean "Design and produce a Kingdom of Loathing drink." We began taking the steps necessary to bring a drink from the Kingdom of Loathing to the fantasy world that we occupy. First, we had to choose a drink. We decided upon the Pink Pony because a gang of goblins had dropped off a bushel of strawberries at Entropic's doorstep. The ingredients required to make a Pink Pony are wine, strawberries, and a cocount shell.

In the Kingdom of Loathing, this beverage may only be created by those who possess the Advanced Cocktailcrafting skill. This skill can only be obtained by Disco Bandits. To affirm our place as Disco Bandits, Entropic and I set out to gather the components necessary to create Disco masks. After purchasing a sheet of black foam, some black embroidery floss, and an Xacto knife, I began constructing our masks.

I first made a pattern on paper from which to cut the masks as seen below.



I then cut out the eye holes.



I accidentally tore one of the completed masks while attaching the embroidery floss, so I set out to make a third one. When I was putting away the Xacto knife, disaster struck! I accidentally stabbed myself with the knife and began gushing blood.



Entropic helped me bandage my wound, and all was good. I attached embroidery floss to the masks, and we became Disco Bandits!



Once Balaustine and I had donned the masks, it was time to prepare the cocounut shell. While coconuts have all sorts of wonderful drink storage space on the inside, they are heavily armored to survive trips through tropical oceans unharmed. Defeating these hardened defenses required vigorous application of saw.


My first sawing didn't accomplish much more than scratching the exterior, but I kept at it.

Eventually, Balaustine helped me determine that perhaps, another tool was in order, and progress was made.

After much sawing while Balaustine restrained the unwilling victim, her fingers centimeters from the deadly teeth of the saw, we finally broke through into the soft and delicious interior of the coconut.

Once the lifeblood of the coconut had been drained, we were ready to Cocktailcraft the strawberry wine with which to fill the coconut.

At last, all was ready for our masterpiece.

Balaustine initiated the pour, and our drink was complete.




Disclaimer: No actual grapes were harmed(fermented) in the production of this beverage.
Disclaimer Disclaimer: That means there was no alcohol.