Following on the heels of The Ørder's successful campaign launch party, it was decided that we would go on a 25 mile victory parade the following day to celebrate our electoral feats and to survey the territories of our beloved Big Onion.

Foregoing the glitz and glamor of the lakefront and downtown (which have been well-surveyed by our favorite foe, Dela Dejavoo), we Onions set off from the North and South, planning to meet up and trek back toward the ancestral political nesting grounds of Chicagoland politics.

The procession from the south was lead by the then Senator-Elect, Markov Walker. This route originated in the neighborhood of Pilsen, passed the outskirts of Little Italy and followed through the Near West Side to Ukrainian Village, on to Wicker Park. The procession from the north was lead by naming. Beginning in Albany Park, this route followed the river to Roscoe Village, south to Bucktown, and on toward Wicker Park.

United, we traveled northwest to Logan Square and then set south, following the parkland boulevards through Humboldt Park, Garfield Park, and Douglas Park on into Little Village.

While stopping for some avocados, we were informed by Ørder Headquarters that the Senatorships had been offically confirmed (perhaps in no little part through the persistent charms of Luna Lovegood). Hurrah! Huzza!

Onward, we persisted to McKinley Park and on into a maze of industrial wasteland and rehabbed social clubs in Bridgeport.

We sat in a bar to discuss policy over beers with the locals. One, a fine middle age professional named Jeremy, regaled us with tales of Chicago's political and social landscapes. "The Catholic Church has been in the business of building community for 2000 years," he says, while the Chrononaut at the table notes that it was more like 1500. "The parishes are a much better indicator of what is a neighborhood than the names we use like Pilsen or Bridgeport. I tell a Jewish man I just met that I'm from St. Paul's, he says he's from St. Peter's, and we instantly know a lot about each other."

He tells us about gang activity. "A woman moved in [near where he lived in Pilsen] recently and opened up a business. She said the gangbangers make her nervous. I told her, I said 'those gangbangers are your best friends.' You don't want to get too friendly with them, but you want to be neighborly, because let me tell you, they're always there. They don't want any trouble, ok? So if someone's causing trouble in your store those gangbangers are going to be there right away. The cops won't be there for five minutes, and those five minutes make all the difference, ya know?

"I knew a woman who lived in the building where Simone's is now. It wasn't Simone's then. She was coming home at one in the morning and guy pushed her down in her door. In half a minute two Bishops were on that man's ass. Beat him to a pulp and then handed him over to the cops, yeah? Guy gets out on bail and has the charges dropped. That beating was the only punishment he'll ever get, but let me tell you, he won't be attacking anyone like that again.

"Now you, you live at an interface. Blue Island and 18th, that's a sort of interface. You got four gangs with territory near there. You've got the the Ambrose out to the west and the Bishops north and east. There's a lot of violence around there. Just remember, none of them are going after you. They're a part of a game that you don't want to be involved in. When you hear gunfire, you hit the ground. Get down and don't look up. Don't be a witness, 'cause they'll kill witnesses too. You don't want to be any part of it."

Gangs leads us into politics. "The Puerto Rican gangs, they got turned into politicians. The Latin Kings control those Puerto Rican neighborhoods around Humboldt Park. [Some politician whose name I can't remember], he was smart, he took the smartest gangbangers and turned them into politicians.

"When they redrew the Congressional districts, the Republicans wanted to concentrate the Democratic vote. So the fourth district started in Humboldt Park, then went in a thin line down 294 to Pilsen. The district's shaped like a pair of glasses or a bra," he says, putting his fists a short distance apart on the map laying on the table. "What did those neighborhoods have in common? Nothing really. They're both Latino, but they're totally different. Mexicans and Puerto Ricans got nothing in common. Mexicans mainly care about immigration. Puerto Ricans aren't immigrants. It's not an important issue for them, ya know? They're natives. Gutierrez, to his credit, he's gone a long way to making inroads with the Mexicans. He's built a strong base with the Mexicans in Pilsen."

And here's where he gets into the advice for a nascent political movement. "When the Mexicans started moving here in the 70's, they made the mistake of modeling their politics on the blacks. The blacks used protest politics because that's all they could do, ya know? They couldn't build their own political machines, so they had to protest. But the Mexicans, they were more like the Irish than the blacks. They should have modeled their communities on the Irish, ya see. To a politician, a person's only worth listening to if they get out and vote. The Irish communities, they're organized. They turn out their voters. The Puerto Ricans too. The Mexicans, they don't show up. To a politician, one Irishman is worth five Mexicans. You gotta get them to vote."

We carried our bodies the rest of the way home to Pilsen, reflecting on this wisdom. The Irish helped get two Daleys elected for over 20 years each. Today, Daley Jr announced that he would not seek re-election. Whose machine will it be now?

A rough estimate equates 25 miles to 200 city blocks in Chicago. We were asked if we were lost once. We were rained on a little bit. We were lost once, for the span of about three-four blocks.

Marchers from the North traveled 25.58 miles, from the South 25.1 miles.