Misdirected Fan Mail by Jellybean of Thark
August 6th, 2008 10:17 AMI don't doubt that if you shared a name with a celebrity you'd get an unlisted phone number after the first few calls.
That's what Steven Urkel did after his friend named a character after him for a show he was writing. And so, it was actually a little difficult finding a celebrity name, let alone one I'd want to take the time to write a letter to.
And then I found him: Miguel de Cervantes!

El Principe de los Ingenios is apparently alive and well, and living in South Gate. Who knew?
The author of my favorite book is the perfect person to make fangirl mooneyes at. And that's exactly the sort of letter I wrote.
Let's see if he answers.

A week later, and no response.
I guess he really is dead. You win this round, Wikipedia.
And now the Accidental Lightning Round:
Speaking of fangirl mooneyes...
When first reading the description for this task, I'm not sure why, but I must have misinterpreted the instructions to mean that I was to send fan mail to someone who would not normally receive it. Perhaps a lunch lady, or a cop. Or in my case, local television weatherman Fritz Coleman. The Prince of Weather himself. I can't remember a time when he wasn't the weatherman, and he's just a lot of fun to watch.
Perhaps I had inadvertently applied the instructions for this task.
Below, you'll find my original completion for this task:
Solid.
I really had been planning on writing Fritz for some time, he really is pretty cool. This task, provided me with the impetus to finally do something about it.
If you're interested, the text of my letter can be read below. If it's tone strikes you as gushing fangirl prose, it's because that's exactly what it is. I really do watch the channel 4 news instead of others because of him. This is saying a lot, because I can't stand anchorman Paul Moyer.
I just want to say again, that I'm not trying to be "ironic", my feelings toward Fritz Coleman are genuine, and I don't know that a weatherman gets a lot of fan mail.
Saturday, April 11
The letter is off. I don't know that I'll necessarily get a response, but I think I'll wait and see.

Friday, April 18
Getting mail is always nice, even better when it's a letter.
Check this out:

Could it be?..
Hey...

It is!

He sure has nice handwriting doesn't he?
Can you believe it? He actually answered. Handwritten letter and all. What a nice guy.
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What did you say to Cervantes?
I mean, I wouldn't know where to begin!
It wasn't anything too fantastic.
I told him I dug his most famous book, and asked him if he had a favorite translation (mine's Walter Starkie's). I mentioned that I'm honored to have him spend his golden years in Southern California.
Hooray for replies!
Can we see all of Fritz's letter?
I hadn't planned on that being part of the completion. But I can type in the text of the letter tonight if you like.
This is what his note said:
"C.M.
I'll tell you... You made my day getting your letter!
I appreciate your generous comments!
I have a great time at my job and am sometimes amazed they continue to let me do this!
Thank you thank you!
Best - Fritz Coleman NBC4"
fritz coleman and our crazy weeklies are the two things i really miss from socal culture
a collaboration may be the only thing that would really make me want to move back
We'll just have to do something about that then, hey?
Yeah, to us native Angelinos, Fritz Coleman is the God of Weathermen.
You got a letter from a god.
Did you see the Cervantes memorial in Golden Gate Park?
Guess you'll have to come up and visit again.
You're welcome to travel up there with me on the 16th...
I admit it. I'm voting for the fact that you did it wrong and recognized how great your mistake was and submitted it.
Aww, Fritz Coleman. He really has it goin' on.
Cervantes has a cute ruff, but no real game compared to Fritz.
Oh, so this is that... sf-oh thing you play, right?
Reading this praxis is like watching a man stab a bear in the mouth with a straight razor: Cripplingly Awesome. I don't entirely know why. Maybe it's the combination of one of my favorite authors of all time and a weatherman who seems like he could impregnate a harem with a single seductive gaze. This is good stuff.
Damn, that's great. Thanks.
I heard Fritz Coleman once stabbed a bear in the mouth with his bare hands.
Fritz!