Campaign Trail by Ohrlyeh Totenkinder
April 4th, 2007 10:58 PM
). You may then select a congressional committee and subcommitte (What I do know is that the great nation of SF0 is teetering on the precipice of doom. An individual in our own midst threatens to conquer and destroy everything we have created. If Elected I plan to meet the challenges of our security head on by constantly monitoring the actions of this individual and implementing a 7 tiered color coded system, code named “Roy G. Biv” to inform you, the people, of the potential threat level. We truly are in the midst of a frightening new crisis and as the representative for Humanitarian Crisis, I will not stop until this particular perpetrator is brought to justice.
I know you are asking yourself, “Will P00n really be able to keep me safe?” I’ve risen from the dead! I can do anything! I challenge you to name 5 individuals in history who have done this and NOT been related in some way to God!
What else do I have to offer beside ensured safety for you and your loved ones?
B
4/5/07 Addressing Concerns About My Character and the General Lack of Interest In My Candidacy:
I know that I am a relative newcomer to the game, but allow me to assure you that I am as excited about the possibilities that SF0 represents as any of you are or have ever been. I think that the excitement, creativity and energy that I have put into my task completions show that to be true.
As for questions about my trustworthiness, I have shown no reason to draw such accusations. However, in the case of Burn Unit I have concrete evidence supporting the claim that his mustache isn’t even real. If you are the kind of person that can deceive the world about facial hair where do the lies end? I feel that your focus should move to real issues such as this instead of wild unfounded mudslinging in my direction.
I will continue on this campaign trail regardless of slander, disapproval or apathy. I will prove through this campaign that I am the right player for the job.
April 8 2007
After considering Burn Unit's explination for his faux facial hair I am diven to compasion for his plight. I apologise for throwing out this herring. In a moment of weakness I attempted to divert the critical eye of the masses from myself and there by cheaply exploited the handicap of another canidate. If presented with the same circumstances, I will probably do it again.
I would now to address some serious murmurings that I have overhead regarding this new era of SF0. It has come to my attention that some players are concerned about the method by which new players are approaching the game. I for one started playing for a few reasons Firstly because I love games and a majority of my free time was spent in front of a screen umbilicaled to some shared surrogate hallucination. Once being introduced to SF0 first by Mella and Nicole and then again some time later by Avidd, rabbit and Rubin, I realized that I could get something more out of my gaming than just the act of gaming itself. I Could create and push the boundaries of everyday life. I could bring art into the world in small shiny, sharp, subversive bits. I could not only stutter the monotony in my own life, but the within the lives of the random people outside of SF0 I brought into my gaming experience. Though it would not be a game without the incentive of goal, It is the art of the game that drives me most: not points. I would ask all the new players to read this as well as the rest of the "Note To Players" completions, because the beauty of SF0 lies beyond the bare minimum of required completion.
I would also like to send out a petition to the veteran players. To coin a cliché, please don't throw out the baby with the bath water. I see very few of you showing since the reset. I don’t know all of your reasons, but I was excited to get to play with you on more of a peer level than I was able to in the last couple months of Impossible Exchange. I, for one, began my time here hearing about all the stunts and PVP that went on for the first few months of the game. I hope that the legacy of, as I believe Rubin said, (though I may be misquoting since I was drunk on sake at the time) "Retarded fucking with each other" is not over. There is still promise here and I am going to do my best to poke it with a sharp stick repeatedly until it is really annoyed.
This will be my official platform (allong with whatever else the other canidates make to be their platforms). I want to encourage and perpetuate creative and boundary breaking task completion across group boundaries. I want the game to grow and to bring the opportunities available in SF0 to anyone who wants to run with them. I will be guilty of knocking out some easy task here and there with a less than stunning completion, but I hope that a majority of my game time will be vote worthy. I will be bringing my campaign to the streets once my current volley of tasks have been completed and it will reflect my stated aim as a future SF0 elected Official.
May 15 2007 Announcement!!!!
Due to the recent stagnation in my efforts to get myself elected I would like to announce that I have hired the infamous Lowteck as my personal campaign manager. I will not publicly address any questions regarding promises or favors which I may or may not have offered Him for his services. things are about to get interesting.
Also:
In an effort to individually address the concerns of each and every one of my future constituents and to sway the ever important R0ck C4ndy vote I would like to debut my campaign slogan this week with LESS WORDS!!!!
May 17 2007THE P00n CAMPEIGN HAS FINNALY HIT THE STREETS
Some of you may have seen the campaign posters on the front page, well now we reach out beyond cyberspace to the physical theatre of sf0 with ....the germans did it with bombs for the wrong reasons, but P00n does it for you with love!
you can see a photo of the first volley which is proudly displayed on Market St near 7th across from 10 United Nations Plaza
Although I have fallen into third place after Cyber Kitty disgracefully rode the wave of anti Rubin sentiment. I am now kicking my efforts into high gear to get your votes and make SF0 the best place on the interweb!!!!!
YOU HAVE NOT SEEN THE LAST OF P00N!!!!
MAY 18!!
KISSING HANDS AND SHAKEING ASS!!
Last night LT and I pounded the pavement like it was a dirty hippie with a sassy mouth! See the photos from the nearly completed P00n for Senate Poster Blitz We also brought the campaign directly to the doorsteps of several players and then made our way to 111 for Seeing Beyond Salon to personally vie for votes. Despite prompting from Koyah, I proceeded to not show anyone my nuts all night long. (this I feel was an incredible political move on my part)
I was also able to sway Koyah from his adamant partisan stance to a more cooperative voting position (aka voting for me.)
p.s. Anna1=HAWT
VOTE FOR EVERYONE, BUT MOST IMPORTANTLY: VOTE P00n!!!!!!!!!!!
In defence of Rubin and as a proponent of the need for villans in the world I have instituted the SF0 Rubin Starset Flash Mob.
I will not be turning this in as the flash mob task this is simply a P00n for Senate Event!!!
5/31/07
THE MOB WAS A SUCCESS!!!
My leadership skills should no longer be in question and yet I still have not elected to the office of senator.
INFACT, WORSE STILL, CYBER KITTY HAS TAKEN OFFICE AHEAD OF ME WITH HER ANTI RUBIN AGENDA. apparently my point was not made!!!
there is only one course left to me. It is drastic, but I fear it is the path that I must take.......
not much
More to come.
June 11, 2007 7:25PM
HOLY SHIT, IT IS ABOUT FUCKING TIME!
29 vote(s)
- Flower
- SNORLAX
- Jason 7au
- Cthulhu Kitty
- Lindz S
- LeEvil
- JR Bobb Dobbs
- Shazbot [TKC]
- Burn Unit
- Cameron
- Blue
- Malaysian Eddy
- anna one
- Heather Mooflyfoof
- Davor
- avidd opolis
- Fonne Tayne
- Saint
- Orion
- bigglesworth
- Lank
- Pish
- Faux
- Jeremy Cezanne
- Darkaardvark
- Radioactive Cheese
- = Wolfgang Hammerschmitt =
- Bex.
- Brandon W.
Terms
(none yet)30 comment(s)
This time, the nuts are really nuts. It's not his nuts, but walnuts.
I wasn't taking any chances.
Is it me, or is this game getting weirder?
Because really my first impressions are that Glasnost is delightful, with a slight hint of fucked up.
yer the one that broke out the penis pump!
That's just how my nuts are.......they sneak up on ya! Just ask Rubin....or Rabbit....or Heather...or Mella...or..um..I could go on but I'm starting to feel like that might not be such a good political move.
hypocrite opportunist
don't infect me with your poison
an anonymous source from another camp say something to the effect of "....anyone with P00 in their name is not to be trusted..."; Could you address this mudslinging please;
That sounds less like mudslinging to me and more like poo slinging. I say anyone who would throw poo has some issues to resolve before they pass judgment on anyone else's character.
Next question.
just do it, I know the suspense is eating you alive.
Poon is making the praxis more interesting than anyone else by far.
I fully support Poon in his senatorial race!
On the other hand, I want to see Evil Poon get his death ray.
I was holding out voting for anybody, but... eh, fuck it.
nutsonline.com
cleeck oon "hut prudooct" or joost "noots."
I wish I could vote twice! (or more).
But, I am offended that you didn't have any anti Cyber Kitty slogans :(
we have a great idea for a website for your slander!!!
In defence of Rubin and as a proponent of the need for villans in the world I have instituted the SF0 Rubin Starset Flash Mob.
I will not be turning this in as the flash mob task this is simply a P00n for Senate Event!!!
More to come.
...I will get to the broccoli shortly
I have been holding out on voting for a while, but I think of all the people deserving my vote, it has to be POON! Plus only crazy people have the right to lead!
an alarming number of p00ns hawking seafood in this world.
and... thighs wide shut?? sorry, what?
Yes! King-making Darkaardvark casts the senator-making vote!
cripes p00n, you made it. what took you so long?
Booyah!
Congratulations, Senator. Now can you please take down those posters? They make the Baby Jesus cry.
AND MY BITCHING IS DONE!....
um now what do we do?
Yes id like to ask all three senators.. what have you got to say for yourselves? Who are going to be your senate staff? Get hiring! Get deliberating about important/unimportant/semiimportant/impish things! Start making waves! The people (I the people) demand it.
Dear Senator,
As one of your supporters, I am disappointed at your lack of action on the broccoli issue. I would like to encourage your firm disapproval of broccoli as an comestible. However, I do acknowledge that by having Senator Lowteck as your campaign manager you must, by proxy, have some form of alignment to the anti-broccoli league. Please, assuage the fears of your constituents by firmly taking a stand on this all-important issue.
Thank you for your consideration.
Faithfully yours,
anna one
I have to oppose you on a strict no nuts policy I'm doing my best to maintain.