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Sam Archer
Ecoterrorist
Level 8: 3256 points
Last Logged In: August 6th, 2024
TEAM: San Francisco Zero TEAM: SCIENCE! TEAM: UCZero TEAM: Run-of-the-mill taskers TEAM: ALL THINGS MEATIFUL! TEAM: Public Library Zero TEAM: Players TEAM: SSF0R (Sphores) TEAM: SFØ Academy BART Psychogeographical Association Rank 7: Pedestrian EquivalenZ Rank 3: Protocologist The University of Aesthematics Rank 5: Anti-Realist Humanitarian Crisis Rank 5: Diplomat Biome Rank 8: Ecoterrorist Chrononautic Exxon Rank 4: Prophet Society For Nihilistic Intent And Disruptive Efforts Rank 3: The Meddlesome






55 + 47 points

Re-upholster the Judas Chair by Sam Archer

March 18th, 2012 10:23 PM / Location: 37.792018,-122.4029

INSTRUCTIONS: Find a ledge or object in a public space that is unpleasant to sit on. Transform it into a comfortable resting place.

I set out one fine afternoon a few weeks ago to wander around the financial district and look for a Judas Chair to upholster. There were a few windowsills with ridges and bumps designed to be inhospitable to weary travelers, but none so fine and medieval-looking as this one:

The Judas Chair.

Of course I'd forgotten to bring something useful like a measuring tape, so I improvised with my camera and a hand, and then spent a couple of weeks scheming in my lair over how to make this spot comfortable to sit on.

My first idea was to build a seat that sat on 2x4s to raise it just over the height of the spikes. Then while I was fruitlessly sifting through my scrap lumber collection looking for 2x4s, I had a better idea: make the spikes a part of the seat. The final design was a plywood platform with a wide groove on the underside where the spikes would sit.

Discount Fabrics provided the upholstery in the form of a sheet of foam and a piece of remnant vinyl. Even though my seat isn't likely to last long, I wanted to build it to be somewhat weather-resistant.

The final step was just a matter of going back at night, installing the seat, and testing it out. Look how comfortable I am!

So comfortable!

I expect as soon as a security guard sees it it's headed for a dumpster, but I'm planning to drive by tomorrow and will report on whether it's still there.

update 3/19/2012: Gone. Didn't see it sticking out of any trash cans; I'd like to think that someone out there "stole" it and it's making their night a little more comfortable.

- smaller

The Judas Chair.

The Judas Chair.


Reference photo of spike height.

Reference photo of spike height.


Reference photo of spike spacing.

Reference photo of spike spacing.


Double-checking that the spacing is correct.

Double-checking that the spacing is correct.


Carpentry completed.

Carpentry completed.


Wrapping it in foam...

Wrapping it in foam...


...and then vinyl.

...and then vinyl.


Ready to be deployed.

Ready to be deployed.


Judas Chair, upholstered.

Judas Chair, upholstered.


Side view - look how nicely it fits!

Side view - look how nicely it fits!


So comfortable!

So comfortable!



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posted by relet 裁判長 on March 19th, 2012 1:59 AM

This is grand. I knew of anti-sliding-the-rails escalators and anti-skateboarding urban furniture, but anti-reposing windowsills definitely take hostility to a next level.

Has it really been *three years* since this task was approved? Yikes. +1
posted by Loki on March 19th, 2012 12:31 PM

A perfect target, and a fine execution. And, props for weatherproofing.