Events / Epic MN0 Barbecue Throwdown
When:July 20th, 2008 @ 8:00am
Where:
A parking lot in St. Paul
1437 Marshall Avenue, Saint Paul, Minnesota
Enrollment
8/unlimited
Organizer:
teucer
Description:
NB: The location has moved! It's less awesome than the original choice, but BU had something come up and this makes it possible for the duel to happen when it was planned.
In the first corner - the Senator of sauce, the Minnesotan master of meat, here to defend the honor of his home state, it's BURN UNIT!
And in the other corner - the lab-coated cook from the Carolinas, the pork-loving Protocologist, bringing southern style to the midwest, it's DOKTOR HARMON!
A while back Dok H criticized Minnesotan attempts at barbecue in a task, and Burn Unit couldn't take that lying down. There was only one way to settle this... a good old-fashioned SF0 duel.
And so on July 20, each one will prepare a significant amount of meat. Food will be served at six, but the competition will begin many hours before then. Judging will be done by anyone who comes by, SF0 players or not. You are of course all invited come enjoy dinner on us... followed by the only dessert that matters - the sweet taste of the loser's tears.
Responses
8 Attending
2 NOT Attending
Terms
(none yet)Comments
Yes, I thought I had made the map work in the event. I seem not to have.
Thanks, BU.
glorious. i really hope it was my put your food where my mouth is task that helped to inspire this.
We were talking about this, though without a finalized date, well before that task was proposed.
But if that task inspires others to do the same thing - excellent.
the winner must taste the loser's "tears of unfathomable sadness"
Oh, wow. Is it possible that the competitors can recreate the above image. Please and thank you!
Rephotography, perhaps?
Of course, there's five people in the background, which means we need at least that many judges or we can't rephotograph it...
Meh, if we frame the shot right there doesn't have to be any actual licking involved.
If there were - I'm not sure either of us would want to take the photo.
Well, aside from alienating our most important judge...
We are in favor of Mr Gonzales's suggestion.
Pikachu, I will GLADLY judge your duel in SF and happily eat all things made
and if you'd like my humble opinion on whom you should glove slap...
challenge Zemaluco!CHALLENGE ZEMALUCO!!!
We would also be able to assist in judging.
You're certainly our main planned judging contingent for this event.
Ms., um, Niddle seems to think that I need at least three, if not more challengers. wtf? How many compete on Iron Chef?
Two, but each one gets an army of sous chefs. (And one of them is chosen by the other out of five possible candidates.)
Mr Hem, I have simply tasted your cooking and feel that any excuse to get you to cook competitively (as you seem to amp it up when there is mud slinging involved) is a good thing.
The world should be filled with more good things; therefore, more cooking challenges for Mr Hem. It is only logical.
Do not take this praise of your cooking as a predictive win for our duel. My food will send you into a pleasure coma.
Did you just correct me in the representation of my own name???
Yes, but only in response to your muddling of my own name.
Do I muddle your name...
Mr Hem. In the Kitchen. With the paring knife.
If Shea and I can, we'll probably try and make it up there and crash your party.
So I will try and get him to drive me up :P
I don't think it counts as "crashing" if everyone is welcome.
Come early! I'm sure we can find a place for you to stay.
The flavors of a good barbecue sauce need time to meld together, and so mine has been prepared as of this morning and will be ready to cook with a week and a half from now.
In other words... Bring it, Burn-boy.
sauce? I thought this was a barbeque.
are you worried your meat won't taste good?
that said, there will be dressings, if one simply must have them, yes.
Of course there's sauce. What would you be basting your meat with? Or will it be dry and stringy?
what? baste?
Jesus, man, are we living in the God damn dark ages?
What, you're one of those injector types?
The problem with that is it impregnates the whole thing with the same flavors. The outside brown and the stuff in the center of the meat should have different textures and different flavors that combine in your mouth.
But if you want something more homogeneous, then have fun with that.
oh lord no. That's fine far as it goes. But seriously? Gimme fire and fat; no basting required.
Oh dear, C.M. You seem to have run out of clever food-related substitutions for "snap". Is that really all you can come up with? Seriously? That's just sad.
Actually none of those were intentionally food related.
Huh. In western North Carolina, the sauce served with barbecue is also known as "dip" - so naturally I assumed when you posted the first of these comments that you were making a clever but obscure pun.
Cool, now I know a new local expression.
But I have to point out that we're getting away from the important subject at hand:
Trash talkin'
Are you such a fool you can't spot low-level trash talk when it changes direction and comes straight at you, then?
EDIT: I suppose I did take a one-post break there, but that should not be taken as any indication that I'm done. No cook worth his dry rub would be out that quickly.
And my friend Shaw tells me that you are like a stream of bat's piss.
But you're right. We've gotten away from the real subject here, which is of course the inevitable victory of vinegar sauce, applied sparingly to the superior piece of pork. I have no intention of letting the esteemed Senator get that coveted Duel Winner badge on this occasion.
Use all the vinegar you like, it won't hide the scent of failure
Yeah. The stench of failure gets on everything it's even close to and overwhelms all flavor. I confess I'm a little worried about that, actually, as you'll be there cooking right next to me.
Yessss, good! Use your aggresive feelings, boy. Let the hate flow through you.
What, you think I haven't already embraced my aggressive feelings? I'll point out that I was the first to actually throw down the gauntlet and start a duel with Senator Unit.
And I'll have him know that collaborative tasking only sharpens my mind, honing my skill to make him even more assured of his defeat. Weak mind? Weak at competitive tasking of all things? That assertion might be insulting if it weren't coming from somebody who's lost so many deals it can't be taken seriously.
No, I just get excited about things. I'm very good at it.
I on the other hand am not very good at holding my own in this thread.
But that's OK, because unlike BU my skills are concentrated on the food.
Oh good. Wouldn't want to handicap you any further with distractions. Unlike Doktor Harmon, I can dedicate 98% of my day to trash talking and still win. It wouldn't be fair to do otherwise.
Spidere and I will not be able to attend, unfortunately, though we would like to be in MNØ on Saturday.
We will cast our votes based on who's meat is tastier as of Saturday night.
I look forward to seeing you both on Saturday, then.
In particular I look forward to seeing you slightly earlier on Saturday than you see me.
LOCATION HAS MOVED!
We'll now be dueling in the parking lot of 1437 Marshall Avenue, St. Paul, instead of the original location.
That was tasty.
My congratulations to Senator Unit - while my piece of meat was indeed of high quality, his was judged superior by both competitors and by every judge.
My apologies to C.M., but we did not photograph the drinking of tears. Other praxis, however, will follow.
map